A Detective Interview with Stinky and Ben

S: Benjamin Jinks, I have been asked to interview you about our latest adventure, ‘My Hamster Is A Detective’.

B: You know, I’m not such a big fan of that title, Stinky. It should be ‘My Hamster And Me Are Actually Both Detectives’.

S: (sighs) Well, firstly, if you care about grammar, you should say ‘My Hamster And I…’. Secondly, that title of yours wouldn’t even fit on the cover of the book. And, thirdly and most importantly, you could hardly detect your own nose, not even if you were looking in the mirror.

B: (impatiently) Aren’t you going to ask me any questions?

S: Alright – here are two: when are you going to clean out the poo from my cage? And, also, can you get me a piece of carrot?

B: I meant questions about our latest adventure.

S: Oh. Yes. So, how does it feel to be working alongside an absolute genius?

B: (groans) If you mean ‘how does it feel to be part of an incredible crime-fighting duo?’, then it feels great. Terrifying, at times, but really exciting. It’s a bit like being Batman and Robin.

S: I’d be Batman, obviously.

B: Hang on. Batman is the older, bigger one of the duo. And a robin is a cute little thing, like a hamster. So,..

S: Firstly, Batman is the brains of the outfit, so that would have to be me. Furthermore, robins are actually vicious little birds, and not at all cute. However, you have just given me the idea for another question, Ben: if you could have one superpower, what would it be, and why?

B: I’d like to be invisible. It would have come in very handy in this adventure, but it would also be really cool around the house: I’d make Lucy think there was a ghost. It would really freak her out!

S: So, if you had a superpower, you’d mostly use it to tease your little sister?

B: Pretty much.

S: (sighs, annoyed) I have one more question.

B: OK.

S: Can you please leave me in peace, so I can have a nap?

Stinky is Sleuthing like Sherlock!

Hello, readers.  Stinky the hamster here

Following a rather close call with a devious catnapper – and a particularly smelly search through our neighbour’s rubbish bin – I have come to the conclusion that I’m very much like a small, furry Sherlock Holmes! The great Sherlock Holmes lived at 221B Baker Street, London and I live in a small cage in Ben’s bedroom, but the famous detective and I actually have rather a surprising amount in common:

1.     We’ve both got silly names. My full name is Jasper Stinkybottom. (I did not choose my own name.)
2.     When Sherlock had a difficult case to solve, he often smoked a pipe or played the violin to help him think.  Of course, smoking is a very bad habit indeed, especially for rodents, and I don’t have access to musical instruments.  However I do have a wheel in my cage, and going for a run often helps me to come up with ideas (and helps me keep fit at the same time). Great minds really do think alike!
3.     My owner, Ben, asked me point out another similarity: Sherlock Holmes could often be short-tempered, and, according to Ben, I have been known to lose my temper, too – so would you, if you were stuck in a cage pretty much all of the time, and had to sleep only 15 centimetres from your own poo..
4.     Both Sherlock and I appear in books!  Mr Holmes stars in the brilliant stories written by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, who is widely regarded as one of the great writers of the last 200 years. My adventures, on the other hand, feature in the ‘Stinky & Jinks’ books written by a guy called Dave Lowe, who is sometimes regarded as one of the best writers in his own family.
5.     Sherlock has an assistant called Dr Watson, who is an actual doctor, and who is nice and helps him solve crimes.  I have Ben.  He’s nine.  He’s not particularly bright, and doesn’t clean out my cage enough, but he is occasionally helpful when I’m trying to solve a mystery . . .

I don’t want to seem immodest, but surely I must be the best hamster detective of all time?! See for yourself in the latest Stinky and Jinks adventure, My Hamster is a Detective – it’s much shorter than the Sherlock Holmes novels, and is full of brilliant pictures, including one or two of me . . .